Lost Through Motherhood by Tiffany Charters – The Career Woman’s Coach

So many mothers lose themselves, I have named this phenomenon “The Untold Secret” all our foremothers kept from us. Slowly without even realising your passions, purpose, confidence & interests just fade into the background and before you know it you have no idea who you are any more.

There comes a time, during they parent journey we wake up one day and think who the hell am I? You will realise that you can’t remember when was the last time you read a book start to finish, when you last did something you loved doing, what your hobbies are and the last time you had some R&R (rest & relaxation) by yourself!

When I became a mum my whole world turned upside down, I had this little person to take care of (and another one exactly one year later), nurture and give all of my attention and love to. I totally forgot that I existed any longer, I didn’t take care of myself, nor did I do anything I used to love doing, it was literally everything for my children.

Motherhood is just so busy changing nappies, feeding, going to play groups, cleaning, cooking and Not to mention being wife too. Apparently mum’s spend the equivalent of three 40-hour work weeks changing nappies per child per year and are forced and attend to their toddlers 210 times every day. That does not even include everything else we do in the day.

The day you find out you are having a child, you start preparing to welcome you gorgeous Bundle of joy, but neglect to think about your transition from the person you once were to the one you are yet to become. So many mothers lose themselves, I have named this phenomenon “The Untold Secret” all our foremothers kept from us. Slowly without even realising your passions, purpose, confidence & interests just fade into the background and before you know it you have no idea who you are any more.

There comes a time, during they parent journey we wake up one day and think

Each and every mum will get this wrong before they get it right, as women we are programmed to nurture (even those that don’t have kids), we always tend to look after the needs for other before our own. Unfortunately this will lead use to a path of vulnerability, low self esteem and low confidence once the realisation hits.

Don’t worry all is not lost, you can start again and find yourself again, you go on pursuit of being the best mother and also have something for yourself guilt free. You just need to schedule in you time and start reconnecting with who you are now.

5 Ways to Reconnect with Who You Are After Motherhood:

1. Do something that is just for you; in you’re me time. Each and every week schedule this in and keep to it.
2. Dig deep within yourself and fine one thing that will make you happy. Commit to making it happen and there after find the next and the next……
3. Create a vision board of career, life, family goals that you have. Include your plans for development, maybe starting your business, weight lose from pregnancy or completing a 5k run, for example.
4. Start doing some things you did prior to becoming a mum.
5. Expand your network, this can include social media (i.e. relevant Facebook groups), networking events locally, mums & toddler groups etc etc.

Each and every mum will get this wrong before they get it right, as women we are programmed to nurture (even those that don’t have kids), we always tend to look after the needs for other before our own. Unfortunately this will lead us to a path of vulnerability, low self esteem and low confidence once the realisation hits.